"you and me can rest our bones, a place where we can both call home..."

WE'RE IN!

Fucking hell what a relief. A stressful week all round, fucking about with references, account details, money and other suck bollocks has all gone by the wayside and matters not as we have moved in! Saturday afternoon wasn't quite the romantic vision I had of picking cutlery and choosing what set of crockery to get and then skipping home with our shared goods. It was a pisser of an afternoon where neither of us could choose anything, or make any kind of decision whatsoever. A row was avoided however, and in rather spectacular fashion we happily settled on some square scratchy plates and mugs and bowls that are too small and cutlery thats very heavy and kinda stripy, but the spoons are deep so thats good. We don't have any bins and have managed to damage the wall already which isn't very good, but we're happy. Jenny, my best friend and once proud housemate of mine, came over on Sunday night to inspect the place. "This flat has good energy." she said. Now, I don't know much about that hippy crap, the closest I get to hippyness is some old flares, a love of fire, nakedness and Neil Young, and being friends with Frank, but I kinda have to agree with her. It already feels like we've been there awhile.
Thats a good thing I think.
I have to be honest though - I think it takes me a little longer than others, well certainly Evan, to fully fit myself in somewhere new. By that I mean adapt and feel comfortable. Evan's right in there, like a pig in shit, but I've been a bit more tentative and unsure. That is until this morning. This morning I felt normal and I knew where things were, and I had a bit of a routine. Evan makes me a cuppa tea in the morning, has made me dinner three nights in a row and is generally being the best roomie ever!
I'm sure it won't last but I'm milking it for all its worth while it does ;0)

The agent bint who made our lives miserable last week has emailed me this morning. Its a standard pleasantry that they must fire off to all new tenants but reads as this:

Dear Dani

Hope your move went well. I wish you all the best of luck for your new home. Should you like to comment on the service provided by us please contact at the following email address: ***

Kindly,

Here is my draft reply:

Dear Cock end

Our move went very well thank you and we're very happy to be in. This is of course despite the absolute horror of dealing with you, and your money grabbing vile company. We found your services inadequate at best and you personally were pushy, demanding, sly and damn right fucking rude. My favourite bit being the bit that you told us that not only was our rent going to be more than we had previously agreed on and that had been cleared by you, but that we were to be left with no bed or couch or any other furnishings that were promised for our FURNISHED flat. But its ok, cos you waived your already extortionate admin fee and said we can buy a couch and bed with that. On what fucking planet can you buy a bed, a mattress and a couch for £200 that is devoid of fleas, and isn't dogshit? You conniving, manipulating, fat ankled, hope you get bird flu, South African cunt face.

yours sincerely

Chronic

Evan - wanna add anything?