"She's just a devil woman; with evil on her mind..."
It's Mothering Sunday on er...Sunday. It was of course my Mum's birthday last Sunday, so that's two presents, two cards etc etc. The card I have for her Mother's Day however, is the funniest - most sick making card I've ever seen.
It's got Sir Cliff Richard on the front. He's wearing black slacks, a pristine white shirt (tucked in) and a black suit jacket (smart/casual). He's got his hands in his pockets and he's standing at the bottom of a Mediterranean-esque outside staircase looking a little smug.
As you open up the card his sickly-sweet-good-Christian-soft-Home-Counties-obviously-gay voice says "To a special mum, who's one in a million. Have a wonderful day."
WHAT A DICK!!!!
The man has sold more records than anyone else in the world EVER and has had his fair share of bad and good publicity. There is no need for him to make this card. At all. He must have the worst management/PR team in living history to have made this card. Its so bad that it crosses the line of so bad it's good, and goes on further to a whole other level of badness.
I'm very well educated on Sir Cliff. A healthy diet of his music has been polluting my life ever since I can remember. My mum ironing on a Sunday to 'Miss You Nights' or some such bollocks. I actually think she still wears a Cliff jumper...
Through work I met a sound guy who does sound monitoring for Cliff and who was able to get me and my Mum in to see Cliff at the Royal Albert Hall. I organised this for her birthday and Mother's Day present last year. So we went last April. We sat at the sound desk bit. 3 hours he went on for. 3 HOURS.
And everyone brings presents for him and walks excitedly up to the stage to hand over their gifts. Cakes, flowers, cards, pants, someone had actually knitted him a jumper I think!!! Its like a cult.
My mum is too cool to have bought a present but she couldn't resist going up to the stage whilst he played 'Miss You Nights' (her favourite song) and sway.
I sat there thoroughly bored and quite embarrassed. How could my Mum be this hilariously tragic.
It did get me to think though - when I have kids, will they be embarrassed by my music taste. Will they sit and cringe as I race forward to join the mosh pit at Reading Festival, tutting and rolling their eyes? I'm pretty sure they will. Maybe they'll like Cliff - because the 'I love Cliff' gene has most definitly skipped this generation...
Is it wrong to frank a Mother's day card for posting?
It's got Sir Cliff Richard on the front. He's wearing black slacks, a pristine white shirt (tucked in) and a black suit jacket (smart/casual). He's got his hands in his pockets and he's standing at the bottom of a Mediterranean-esque outside staircase looking a little smug.
As you open up the card his sickly-sweet-good-Christian-soft-Home-Counties-obviously-gay voice says "To a special mum, who's one in a million. Have a wonderful day."
WHAT A DICK!!!!
The man has sold more records than anyone else in the world EVER and has had his fair share of bad and good publicity. There is no need for him to make this card. At all. He must have the worst management/PR team in living history to have made this card. Its so bad that it crosses the line of so bad it's good, and goes on further to a whole other level of badness.
I'm very well educated on Sir Cliff. A healthy diet of his music has been polluting my life ever since I can remember. My mum ironing on a Sunday to 'Miss You Nights' or some such bollocks. I actually think she still wears a Cliff jumper...
Through work I met a sound guy who does sound monitoring for Cliff and who was able to get me and my Mum in to see Cliff at the Royal Albert Hall. I organised this for her birthday and Mother's Day present last year. So we went last April. We sat at the sound desk bit. 3 hours he went on for. 3 HOURS.
And everyone brings presents for him and walks excitedly up to the stage to hand over their gifts. Cakes, flowers, cards, pants, someone had actually knitted him a jumper I think!!! Its like a cult.
My mum is too cool to have bought a present but she couldn't resist going up to the stage whilst he played 'Miss You Nights' (her favourite song) and sway.
I sat there thoroughly bored and quite embarrassed. How could my Mum be this hilariously tragic.
It did get me to think though - when I have kids, will they be embarrassed by my music taste. Will they sit and cringe as I race forward to join the mosh pit at Reading Festival, tutting and rolling their eyes? I'm pretty sure they will. Maybe they'll like Cliff - because the 'I love Cliff' gene has most definitly skipped this generation...
Is it wrong to frank a Mother's day card for posting?
posted by Fang at 3:21 AM
5 Comments:
Franking a mother's day card says "you're not worth an extra 28p and besides I'm too lazy to drag my sorry ass to postbox, so just be grateful you've got anything at all. I didn't ask to be born you know."
However, it is acceptable for all other cards.
Not even to mention the fact that it was ME who bought the fucking card in the first place!!! Get off your lazy arse and buy a FIRST CLASS stamp you young pup!
He also does a range of birthday and congratulations cards. Busted do a similar line in Birthday cards. "Hi! This Is Busted! We suck balls!" or some such thing.
I've bought a book of 6 first class stamps...I was just kidding.
Squeak...
You see, I disagree.
Anything free is worth a bump, so to speak. But then again, Chad's sentiment isn't so far from my view point so...
haha my kids do EXACTLY that when I am roaring out the words to my favourite tune (which often involves a scream or two)
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